Awakening

So.... Hello blog old friend. I miss you.  Today I went to Kemaman. Just like any other work related trips, it will usually be the hurried I-really-need-to-be-in-the-van feel, then the laid back breakfast (gotta lay off the carbs!) and a good post prandial sleep before starting actual work.  But today.. I was feeling melancholic, not least because somehow I got Lifehouse's No Name Face on my Spotify. Their songs reminded me of medical school, I would listen to their songs almost every day!

So anywho..I was reminded of my blog... I miss you old pal. I miss writing, I miss my abstract self. I haven't written anything in ages. Work related pieces not included of course. I need to start writing again. I need to start speaking in English again. I hate how I sound when I speak Terengganu dialect. Not being snobbish or anything of course but I just hate it!

The kids are driving me crazy. I love them to bits but they are draining my identity bit by bit. So enough about them for now.

I've been thinking today, how I've grown up over the past years. Reading my previous post, I was talking about how I need a backbone..oh actually I do have a backbone now! I no longer have the need to please everyone, I know exactly what I want or don't want and I know how to get them. I am now able to hold my tounge ( for the most parts) and say what needs to be said at the most appropriate time. For that I am ever so thankful dear Lord. There are so many things in life that I need to be grateful for and I have not done enough to show my gratitude.

I am not complaining..I just feel... incredibly bored with my workplace. I need a place to spread my wings. I cannot stay here anymore. My mind is slowly becoming small and meek. May Allah ease..

I have deleted facebook and instagram apps from my phone..and added Bayyinah TV app.. hopefully this will reflect my aspiration to be a student of the Quran and not a student of STUPID UNFILTERED THOUGHT BROADCASTING DISEASE that is quickly happening in our society right now. Everyone wants to talk but not all opinions are necessary. Not all opinions are bright. In fact most of them are ..dull. Just like mine. But it's okay because this is my blog so I can thought broadcast anytime I want haha.

Lacking inspiration...  Lacking motivation (No, that's not true, I am very motivated to free myself!).. Lacking guidance.... Hate the system.

FOR THAT IDIOT WHO HAS DONE ME WRONG IN 2015 and 2016 I HAVE FINALLY FORGIVEN YOU. YOU ARE STILL A SELF RIGHTEOUS JERK BUT YOU ARE CLEAN IN MY BOOK. NOW PLEASE GO AWAY.

Good night blog.. hope to see you soon and not in a few years time!!

Steel magnolias are made of steel,
Yet your soil is a prickly wool,
Tainting her pretty talons,
Her razor eyes brightly falter.

Gooooooooodnight old friend if I can give you a hug I would.

heheheh

Oooh..so sleepy... need some sleep STAT..(eh macam dlm ER plak eheheh)
okay so this post is not going to be one of my stupid emotional posts...I am actually going to make this sounds upbeat.*yeah! yeah!!*

  hmmm..some people have been pestering me to put their pictures in my blog....so uh, here goes, what I really THINK of you!!!! mwahahahahah!!!

somebody trying to be creative

the prettiest girl in checkered shirt, creature at the back

i think you're cute

you make a cute couple! ^-^

hi!

this picture is so cute.

study partner and life saver.

hand decorated!

I'm too lazy to upload pictures on facebook or blog okay.


Erh.....Dr T is being so weird. I don't want to talk in front of a room full of people and I especially don't want to talk on the phone about this. Please let me go. I don't want that amazon voucher. You're putting too much pressure on me.

You would think paediatrics will be miles easier than medicine and surgery, but it's only day 4 and I am dreading every step I take in the Children Hospital. Why why why? Please kid, please don't cry when you look at me. I can't help it that my stethescope is cold, and if I am unable to play with you. I am scared shitless ok, I am probably more scared of you than you are of me.

This is Haarithah being a musical prodigy? This is Iggle Piggle's song.






 Also another pathetic attempt at sewing. I sewn this together and thought it was alright when suddenly housemate came in and said "eh ni kau memang nak senget eh....." epic FAIL and waste of 20 mins.

I WASN'T PREPARED FOR THIS.

xoxo